Powerful Techniques to Strengthen Your Interpersonal Soft Skills

In the Season 2 premiere episode of Soft Skills: Strong Results, I'm back and breaking down why interpersonal communication and soft skills are the foundation of strong relationships and sustainable professional success. Drawing from years of my own personal experience, I'll be explaining how mastering soft skills leads to clearer conversations, deeper trust, and better outcomes at work and in life.

You’re about to learn why active listening is more than just hearing words and how paying attention to tone, pauses, and body language improves understanding as I share practical techniques for slowing down conversations, resisting the urge to interrupt, and creating space for more thoughtful, productive dialogue.

This episode also explores the power of genuine appreciation and how acknowledging others strengthens connection and collaboration. I'm offering simple, actionable ways to express gratitude authentically while reinforcing positive behaviors and mutual respect.

Finally, I cover setting healthy boundaries and fostering inclusive collaboration without damaging relationships. This episode outlines how to say no with clarity and professionalism, invite diverse perspectives, and consistently practice communication skills that lead to stronger teams and stronger results.

Key Takeaways

• Active listening requires focusing on understanding, not just responding
• Silence, tone, and body language are critical parts of effective communication
• Genuine appreciation builds trust, morale, and stronger relationships
• Setting clear boundaries protects your time and improves professionalism
• Inclusive collaboration leads to better decisions and stronger teams
• Consistent, intentional practice turns soft skills into lasting strengths

Pick up my book The Power Skills Portfolio: A Leader's Guide to Soft Skills

I'm here to help you master your soft skills and take your communication to the next level! Learn more at CharlieKrebs.com

Transcript

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Welcome to Soft Skills Strong Results. I'm your host, Charlie Krebs. You're about to learn practical strategies to master interpersonal communication. So let's get started. Good day, and welcome to Soft Skills Strong Results. Practical strategies to master interpersonal communication. This is season two, episode one, and I'm your host, Charlie Krebs. Today's episode is on ways to improve your interpersonal communication. Interpersonal meaning between people. Soft skills aren't rocket science, but they're like muscles and they do need to be exercised. So I've got a bunch of simple activities in this episode that you can practice to improve your soft skills. Let's start with active listening. Most people think that they're good listeners, and frankly, most people are wrong. And part of the reason that they're wrong is because people listen for the wrong reason. Most people listen so they can reply. But what they really should be doing is listening so they can respond. Good listening takes practice. So here are a couple of things you can try. In your next meeting, listen for what people aren't saying. Notice their tone, notice their pauses, listen for the discomfort as much as the words. Also, when someone pauses or hesitates, don't try to fill in the pause. Wait and give them time. Let their thinking catch up with them. Silence can often lead to insight. Adaptability. We don't all adjust to changes and circumstances very well, but we can practice it. And here's how. In your next debrief, ask the people, what did we adapt to well and where did we get stuck? And then have a conversation that you can use next time. Also, try working in a different environment. If you're always used to working in the same boardroom or working with the same background, try something that's a little bit different, and it'll give you some flexibility and help what you do be a little more fluid. The next soft skill is appreciation. Recognize people in a way that they can feel. Write down the name of two people that you appreciate and what quality of action you appreciate about them, and then find a way to share it with them. And that's probably the hard part. Sometimes it's difficult to go up to somebody and say, you know what? I just want to tell you how much I appreciate you. But get over that discomfort a little bit and just go up to them and tell them, I appreciate you and tell them why. And it doesn't have to be awkward. Once you do it a few times, it'll get much easier. Also, end the week by identifying a moment of unspoken appreciation for someone. And then go find that person and tell them. Let's talk about boundary setting. Boundary setting often feels like putting up limits and not letting people in or whatever. But what it does is it lets you find ways of telling people how you want to be approached, what your time, how often your time is available, and how you want to be talked to. So before you say yes to the next request that someone brings you, ask yourself if it fits with your priorities. And if not, say no. You can say no clearly and respectfully, and it doesn't have to be rude at all. The other thing you can do to set your boundaries is block off two hours on your calendar. Let your staff know that you've blocked them off. It doesn't have to be two hours in a row. It could be a half an hour for four days. But let people know that you've blocked off that time and then they will respect you and use that time for focused work. The next soft skill is collaboration. Thinking and working with other people creates better results than if you were to try to do it all on your own. So in a meeting, maybe ask somebody that's a quieter person what their opinion is and bring them into the fold. Also, choose an upcoming decision that you have to make and invite other people to give you some feedback before you make a finalized impression or make a finalized decision that sends a message that you value them. Compassion is a great soft skill. It's the ability to recognize when somebody is struggling and show them that you care. So think about this: who on your team might always be lifting people up? Find a way to help that person because sometimes that person can get taken advantage of and you don't want to see them burn out. Also, when somebody slips up, notice what your reaction is. Are you inclined to correct them? Or can you find a way to support them? And that decision is going to make a big difference. Think about if you like being corrected or if you like being supported. Conflict management. Most people, including myself, tend to avoid conflict like the plague. We don't give people feedback that might be in conflict because we're afraid of hurting their feelings. But what you want to do is something called meta communication. And that's communicating about communicating. Don't wait for a conflict before you come up with a battle plan. I remember different times in places where I've been, I would say to somebody, you know, say starting a business relationship, and I'd say, all right, we're getting along just fine now, but let's talk about what happens when we do have a conflict. How do we want to conflict? What kind of language do we want to use? How do we want to respect each other's time so that when that conflict comes up, you've got a plan already laid out and you don't have to worry about the other person's feelings? There's another great concept called stamp collecting. Stamp collect, I remember when I was growing up, we had SNH green stamps. You'd buy groceries or you'd buy gas and you'd get a little stamp and you'd put them in books, and then you take the books down to the SNH green stamp store. I'm dating myself here. And then you can get things for it. I got my first bicycle with SH green stamps. But this concept of stamp collecting, if you do something that upsets me, but I don't say anything, I collect a stamp. And then you do it again, another stamp, and another stamp, and another stamp, and then you do it one more time, and I cash in all my stamps and I blow up. And that's easy to do and kill a relationship in doing it. Also, in terms of conflict, try to avoid you statements. You statements tend to sound accusatory. So instead of you saying to somebody, you make me mad, you could say to them, I'm feeling angry about this. Can we talk about it? And it's upfront, and you're not posting any blame to anyone. Cultural awareness. We all come from different backgrounds. We all have different likes and dislikes. So what you want to do is you want to find a way to include those. One of the simplest things that you can do is learn how to pronounce everyone's name. I was at a meeting yesterday, and there was a woman sitting next to me, and for about three or four weeks, everyone had mispronounced her name. So the MC of the meeting said, wait, can you just say your name for us? And she had us all practice it, and we said it, and I think it made a difference. It made her feel a little more valued instead of always being mispronounced. And then you can find something that you've always done one particular way and think to yourself, do I do it this way for my sake? Or is this working for everyone? Delegation. We think of delegation as a way of getting things off of our plate. And it does, but it does something beyond that. It prepares the next generation of leaders. Sometimes we say to ourselves, you know, it's just easier for me to do this myself. And it is easier to do it yourself. It takes more time to explain it to other people. But if you explain it to people and they learn how to do it, you don't have to go through that process again. And what you're doing is you're telling them that you value them and that you want to groom them for leadership so that then they can do it next time on their own and you can get out of the way and they don't need to use your time to do that. Another thing about delegation is list everything that you have on your plate. Then circle the things that only you can do, and then star the things that with some guidance other people could do. The next soft skill is emotional intelligence. It's noticing your feelings and the feelings of other people. So start by asking yourself at the beginning of each day, what emotional tone do I want to set for the day? And then act in ways throughout the day that match that. Also, in terms of emotional intelligence, look for other people's nonverbal signals and think to yourself, what might they be feeling right now? Empathy. It's the ability to understand how somebody else is feeling and show that you care. And it's not hard. So, for example, after a meeting, let's say there was somebody that didn't speak up much. What you can do is you can either assume that there's something wrong, or you can say to them, you were hesitating during the meeting. Is everything okay? And so that way you're showing empathy for that person. Also, remember a moment where you felt deeply understood. And how did you feel in that moment? And then try to pass that on to somebody else. Let's talk about empowerment. Trusting someone with real responsibility. So you ask somebody, what's something you'd like to take the lead on? And when they tell you, say yes. Or the next time you somebody brings you a question, they want your opinion, start by going, Well, what do you think? That's a great way to empower people. Encouragement. It's a way to recognize people that will lift them up and boost their confidence. So choose one person on your team who's made a quiet effort recently and tell them what you see that they did and tell them why it matters. Also, make a list of five of your teammates and beside each of them, list a way in which they've grown. Not just an accomplishment they've made, but a way in which they've grown. And then tell them that too. Feedback. It's helping people improve by telling them what you noticed. So before giving feedback to somebody, ask yourself if you believe in that person's potential. And then if you do, let that guide what you say to them. You can also change a judgmental phrase into an observational one. So instead of saying, you know, you were too disorganized, you can say, the agenda changed several times. What was behind that? And that way you're not making a judgment. Generosity is a great soft skill. It's the practice of sharing what helps other people succeed. So at your next meeting, highlight someone else's work and say that in front of everyone else. Maybe you connect to people that you think could work well together. That's a form of being generous. Inclusiveness. Make people feel like they belong in the room, not that they're just allowed in the room. So notice who you naturally turn to. And maybe you can broaden your default circle and include other people in that. Maybe review your last three projects and who do are your go-to people for that. Maybe you want to find somebody else so that if you always go to the same people, are you sending a message that they're the only people that you value? Motivation. It's letting other people know that they matter and that you trust their energy. So one of the nice things that you can do to motivate people is when you compliment somebody, make sure other people can hear you. When they hear you, they realize that you value that other person and they can be valued as well. Another great thing is called reverse mentoring. Maybe invite a junior member of your staff who's really good at doing something that you're not. And have that junior member teach you or teach another senior member how to do it and think of how they're going to feel that you entrusted them with that responsibility. Negotiation, trying to seek agreement between people. So it's not just a matter of you give up this and he'll give up that. You're finding a way to come up with something that everyone can believe in. So a nice physical way of doing that is ask everyone to sit, ask the two people involved to sit on the same side of the table instead of facing each other. Because by doing that, you're saying instead of you against me, it's you and me against the problem. The other thing you can do is before beginning, ask each person to summarize what they think the other person's point of view is. And if you do that, you're getting them to open up and consider the other person ahead of time. Nonverbal communication. You know, in communication, only 10% of communication is about the words that we use. The other 90% is about our tone of voice and our nonverbal communication. And of those two, nonverbal communication is the larger portion of that. It has to do with facial expression. It has to do with your body language. It has to do with where you look. It even has to do with how much time you spend with people. So start to think about those things when you're communicating with others. And when you're having a conversation with somebody, look at them. So often what we do is when somebody asks a question, the person who's being asked the question is looking when they're being asked the question. But while they're thinking, they're looking around. While they're answering the question, they're looking around. And then when they're done, they look back. I know it's more difficult to think and look at the same time, but it sends a message that you value the person. So for example, if you're at an interview, try to get to the point where you can look at those people. Perception checking is a great one. A lot of times somebody will do something and you have a perception, like, say, for example, we're in a meeting and you leave and a gust of wind comes along and the door slams. And I'm thinking to myself, oh, I wonder why they're so honked off. And maybe they're not at all. So instead of me thinking they're honked off and then responding to them later based on that emotion, one of the things I can do is I can say, you know, when when you just left there, the door slammed. Was that a gust of wind? Or is there something you'd like to tell me? Persuasion. When you're trying to persuade somebody before you start meeting them with meeting with them, try to figure out what are their values, not what they want, but what they care about. And let what they care about drive you. And also try to speak their language. If they're quick, then you can be quick. If they're laid back, you can be laid back. Use some of the words that they use as well. Rapport. Rapor is about mutual trust. So before you have a meeting with somebody, ask them what they think. Even if you already have a plan, your invitation about asking them what they think is going to make a statement. Here's another thing you can do about rapport. When you go to the go to the boardroom a few minutes early before anyone else gets there, and instead of sitting at the head of the table, sit in the middle and see what kind of an impression that makes on other people. Next, we have respect. Respect basically says your presence here matters. So when somebody shares a mistake that they've made, instead of jumping in, pause for a second, take a breath, and that's communicating to them that you're they're not going to get in trouble. Also, when somebody does work that always goes unnoticed, maybe you can notice it for a second and tell them about it using some of the details because it's easy for people to get overlooked. Team building is how you create something bigger than the sum of its parts. So maybe at your next meeting, ask people, what's one thing about our team that you wish we talked about more? And then see where that conversations go. And then you can also ask them, what's something on what's something you rely on from each other that you've never said out loud and see where that goes. And finally, we have trust. Trust means that you're steady in your behavior, you're honest with your words. Maybe ask one employee what helps them trust a leader? And that might give you some answers you never expected. And also perhaps think of a client relationship that you have that might be a little fragile. And maybe have an open conversation with them and ask them what they think you could do to improve that relationship. Well, that's all for today. Happy to have you with us. My name is Charlie Krebs. Thank you for joining us for Soft Skills Strong Results. And remember, soft skills are the human side of success. Thank you for listening today. Be sure to check out other episodes in the catalog and join me at CharlieKrebs.com to find out how I can help you strengthen your interpersonal communication skills. You can find the link in the show notes.